PARENTING: think PICKHARDT

RECENT PARENTING BOOKS:

  • THE FUTURE OF YOUR ONLY CHILD (2008) (About growing up as an "only.")
  • THE CONNECTED FATHER (2007) (About parenting adolescents.)
  • STOP THE SCREAMING (January 2009) (About family conflict.)
NEXT BOOK:
  • WHY GOOD KIDS ACT CRUEL -- The hidden truth about the middle school years and how adults can stop the harm. (Publisher: Sourcebooks, January 2010) (About social cruelty among early adolescents.)

To shop for any of my books, search by "Pickhardt" on AMAZON.COM

PAST PARENTING BOOKS:

  • PARENTING THE TEENAGER
  • KEYS TO DEVELOPING YOUR CHILD'S SELF-ESTEEM
  • KEYS TO RAISING A DRUG-FREE CHILD
  • KEYS TO SINGLE PARENTING
  • KEYS TO RAISING AN ONLY CHILD
  • KEYS TO SUCCESSFUL STEPFATHERING
  • THE EVERYTHING PARENT'S GUIDE TO POSITIVE DISCIPLINE
  • THE EVERYTHING PARENT'S GUIDE TO CHILDREN AND DIVORCE
  • THE EVERYTHING PARENT'S GUIDE TO THE STRONG-WILLED CHILD


To listen to my Podcast interviews for

THE PARENT'S JOURNAL

(WEEKLY NATIONAL RADIO SERIES FOR PARENTS)

CLICK PROGRAM TITLES BELOW:

Dads and Teenagers     

Children and Divorce

BOOK COVERS

              AND REVIEWS BELOW.

 



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RECENT REVIEWS:

Latest Book:
THE FUTURE OF YOUR ONLY CHILD (Palgrave Macmillan, March 2008). About how 15 dynamics in the only child family can psychologically shape the child's growth, and how parents can choose to moderate or enhance the influence of those dynamics if they so choose.


"This book is a must-read for any parent who has an only child." TEXAS FAMILY MAGAZINE


"As someone who is considering stopping at one child, I've found Pickhardt's tome to be insightful and helpful." Austin American Statesman


"Another plus point about this book: most other books do not talk about the characteristics of an adult only child. Unless we understand the traits of adult onlies, we cannot influence the child's upbringing such that he will be free from the negative aspects of being an only child... I have personally implemented some suggestions from this book, and have benefited from them...I recommend this book not only for first time readers of the topic, but also to those who have read other books on the only child."
The Only Child Project. ( www.onlychildproject.com )


Libary Journal Review, January 15, 2008: "He identifies 15 dynamics...that can create issues in raising an only child. For each dynamic he alots a chapter...The book offers a unique focus on possible long-term effects...Consider purchasing for public libraries with extensive parenting and/or psychology collections." Krista Bush, University of New Haven Library.



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REVIEWS:
THE CONNECTED FATHER
-- Understanding your unique Role and Responsibilities during your Child's Adolescence

(Palgrave Macmillan,2007)


"As the father of two teenagers, I found Pickhardt's book to be an important, supportive, and straightforward look at one of the most challenging stages of fatherhood." - Armin Brott ('Mr. Dad'), author of The Expectant Father and Father for Life: A Journey of Joy, Challenge, and Change

"Provocative and confident...Pickhardt essentially offers quite a male way of dealing with that teeming mass of hormones known as adolescents; he will find an audience in larger public libraries, and his book is an appropriate on-demand choice for other libraries."óDouglas C. Lord, Connecticut State Lib., Hartford, for THE LIBRARY JOURNAL.


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STILL THE DEFINITIVE BOOK ON THE SUBJECT:
  • KEYS TO SUCCESSFUL STEPFATHERING

BARRON'S EDUCATIONAL SERIES,1997.

About building successful Step Relationships.
"Psychologist Carl Pickhardt offers a very practical approach to success as a stepfather in this very focused book. It is an excellent resource for stepfathers in dealing with conflicting emotions, the differences in dealing with stepsons and stepdaughters, and similar issues important in blended families. I highly recommend this book as a great starting place for stepfathers."
www,about.com: Fatherhood
Wayne Parker


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STOP THE SCREAMING -- How to turn angry conflict with your child into positive communication.
(Palgrave Macmillan, January 2009) About common sources of parent/child and family conflict, and how to understand and resolve them.

"While most conflict resolution books focus on the thorny teenage years, Pickhardt takes a holistic approach, looking at all stages of the parent-child relationship. He is also original in that he shows that conflict is neccessary and should be welcomed. He shows how to best use it to shape a child's development, right from crib and all the way to college. In the tradition of 'The Sears Discipline Book,' this would be a one volume guide to to conflict from toddlers to older kids. Parents can refer to it over time and address the particular problems of each stage.  With a distinctive emphasis on how to distinguish types of conflict dependent on age and gender, Pickhardt shows parents how to turn the daily battles into opportunities for growth. This is a practical guide that helps parents confront difficult issues with which all families grapple."

www.pickabook.co.uk

"Noted psychologist Carl Pickhardt has written an insightful parenting book that offers detailed, practical advice on how to manage conflicts. Parents who read this will have the tools to create an environment in which everyone feels safe to talk about feelings and resolve issues calmly." Carolyn White, editor-in-chief, Only Child magazine.

"I hope that even families that don't deal with screaming read it, because I think it has good advice for everyone." Lisa Rivera, author of The Homeschooling Option.


"Most of us are taught that conflict is war. Even when it occurs among loved ones. Therefore, its occurrence means family dysfunction. Pickhardt stands this assumption on its head. He compellingly argues that family conflict, especially conflicts between parents and children, is a necessary component of our connecting. When parents manage rather than react to conflict, without blame of others or self, health emerges. All very well in theory. Fortunately, Pickhardt shows us how to embrace conflict, using example after example of encounters that we have all experienced, and without gilding the lily. Even loving conflict, especially with adolescents, will often be painful. But rather than the pain of loss, this can be the pain of growth."

David Weiner, Ph.D. Sociology



BOOKS OF FICTION
I have grown up in three worlds, and have written a novel about them each.
The world of Trout Fishing: THE TROUT KING.
The world of Street Psychology: THE HELPER'S APPRENTICE.
The world of Fine Art: THE ART LOVER.


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More than a fisherman's tale, THE TROUT KING is a story of the many meanings fishing holds for those who love it, as a competition to determine the champion trout fisherman turns deadly serious when a rough-hewn local who has not been bested is challenged by a fly fishing purist who hates to lose. 'There's much more to fishing than catching fish.'

REVIEWS OF

THE TROUT KING -- A novel about fathers and sons
from: www.xlibris.com


"C. E. Pickhardt has a wonderful way with words. He knows how to create believable characters and exciting scenes. Though fishing is a sport of liesure, THE TROUT KING is unnerving and intense." Phillip Tomasso III for Curled up with a good book: www.Curledup.com

"Verdict: I found it captivating to read in just one sitting. If you're looking for something to read when you aren't fishing, look no further than THE TROUT KING." Lee De Bevoise, angler and Editor, Angler's Bookcase, www.fishdreams.com

"A wonderful novel about competition and comradeship." Bob Kloskowski, Executive Director, International Fly Fishing Association, www.IFFA,org.uk

"This novel has a beginning,middle and end, plenty of fishing adventures, emotional draw and engrossing plot turns to keep the reader involved. I guarantee this story will linger in your mind and leave a worthwhile, lasting impression".
Erin C. Healy, ON THE WATER -- The Angler's Guide to New England.


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THE HELPER'S APPRENTICE -- The Jackson Skye Mysteries (six middle school novels in one volume.) A fictional textbook of real life problems to help young people understand and cope with many normal trials of growing up.
For young adult readers, a multicultural novel about an ordinary boy's apprenticeship to an unorthodox street psychologist, an Afro-American ex-soldier, who helps children and teenagers, boy and man teaming together on over forty cases, starting in elementary school and ending in high school with the hardest case of all.

Available from: www.iuniverse.com ISBN #: 0-595-38993-7, 505 pages, $26.95 or order through bookstores or from online booksellers.


2008 MyShelf.com Review: "When my son was young, my husband would create wonderful stories...about a young boy and always had a wonderfully moral message to them. The stories in THE HELPER'S APPRENTICE, by C.E. Pickhardt are reminiscient of those stories... [which is] actually six books wrapped up in one cover...[spanning] five years in the life of its main character, Chance. Chance, sitting alone one day and feeling quite sorry for himself, meets Professor Skye. The professor takes the ten-year-old under his wing. Chance become's the professor's apprentice, helping him solve the moral issues so common to children and teens today. Each story also helps Chance navigate his own course through the complications of growing up...Book One introduces us to Chance, his immediate family and the workings of his apprenticeship with Professor Skye. Books Two through Six each have a riveting subplot meticulously woven through the moral journeys...I often found myself so drawn to the subplots, I often skimmed (or skipped) the moral adventures to find out what was happening to the characters in the secondary story...C. E. Pickhardt has a real talent for drawing us unto his subplots. I'd love to see a sequel that focuses on this exciting aspect of his writing."
Marcia Berneger, reviewed 2008.


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THE ART LOVER -- About the Love of Art and the Art of Love.

From the sequestered home of a portrait painter and his wife to the galleries of a great museum, from the classroom of a brilliant but brutal art teacher to the villa of a ruthless collector, and finally to the isolated retreat of Riablo, the legendary modern artist, the love of art and the art of love merge in this romance about selfishness, sacrifice, courage, and reconciliation. The story follows the estrangement, separation, and reconciliation of artistically gifted Kate Germaine and her mother Joanne; the growing attachment between museum director Phillip Gambrell and the troubled art teach he hires, Janovar Savocek; and the arduous and finally successful courtship of collector Countess Elena D'Allessandro Riccci by her confidential agent, Eduard LaValle. 

Available from: www.iuniverse.com, ISBN # 0-595-40174-0, 276 pages, $17.50, or order from bookstores or online booksellers.



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                SEVENTH BOOK
OF ILLUSTRATED PSYCHOLOGY (2008):

  • ANIMAL WAYS -- Further Field Notes of a Wildlife Psychologist.

More information at : www.animalways.org

"Thank you so much for your wonderful book: Animal Ways. I love the poetry, the drawings, the lessons, and even the dedication to the blind bird watcher. It is stimulating and fun."
William H. Meadows, President, THE WILDERNESS SOCIETY

"Thank you so much for the impressive book. I wish some of the animals were real." Ingrid Newkirk, President, PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals.)


ANIMAL WAYS is the third in my series of "wildlife psychology" books. The first and second were WILD BIRDS (2002) and FISH OF DREAMS (2003). All are available from www.xlibris.com or on www.amazon.com
The fourth and last will be WORKING INSECTS (forthcoming.)

                               SELECTIONS FROM
                               ANIMAL WAYS

THE RAJAH

A wild-eyed wall
Of stamping Buffalo
To protect their young,
A surly Bear
To defend its kill,
Will fight a Rajah
But no other creatures will
Because
In size,
In speed,
In stealth,
In strength
The Rajah rules,
Free from all restraints
Except its subjects' scrutiny.

When feared by many,
The many keep
Close watch on you.


THE KABUCK

Why raise Kabuck
To trophy size
To kill the deer
To claim a prize?

It's sure not
How it used to be
When hunting was neccessity.

Now it's no longer to survive:
We hunt to keep
The Hunter
Part of us alive.

THE TIPPET

Hard to track a Tippet,
So light-footed
It leaves no trace behind,
No well-worn path to follow
To be remembered
When it's gone.

No desire
To make a name or mark,
It prefers the gifts of anonymity:
Privacy of personal conduct,
Lack of public notoriety,
And freedom to be
Left alone.

THE PAPALONE

The Papalone
Has missed another kill.

It knows the cause:
Loss of speed
And strength
And stealth
To age.

Past hunting prime,
The time has come for its decline.

Growing old is tricky
Because more tricks are needed
To survive:
Robbing kills
The small cannot defend,
Scavenging
What others leave behind,
Eating
What one wouldn't eat before.

As we lose effectiveness,
we must compensate
For loss.

Birds: Buy now
Fish: Buy now